Acrophobia and ancraophobia, describe the two things which frighten me the most. Acrophobia is the fear of heights. Ancraophobia is the fear of wind. I can't tell you exactly when each condition started, but I can remember the first time I felt each one. I was ten, walking home from K-Mart over the 79th Street Bridge in Bridgeview, our town on the southwest side of Chicago. The bridge went over a freight railroad track, which lead to an industrial park that became our playground of rusted railroad spikes and abandoned shipping palettes. Standing at the top of the bridge one day, with the woosh of busy traffic to my back and a speeding freight train underneath, I decided to lean as far over the railing as possible. The motion and wind from the train and the cars, coupled with my being upside down, made me so dizzy that I almost passed out. I was able to right myself, but never again was I able to walk over that bridge, or any bridge, without weak knees. Intensifying my wind fears, is the fact that I can't see wind. People laugh when I say this, but think about it. Wind comes from nowhere and can destroy instantly. It could be a beautiful sunny day, a hurricane, or anything in between. You just cannot predict the wind's force. I saw the damage caused by many tornados when I was a child. People died. The wind could kill. I knew this.
I never know when my fear will stop me cold in my tracks, or when I I'll be able to make it to my goal, wobbly knees and all. One day, I was looking at a new apartment building in Chicago which had a health club on the top floor, fifty stories in the sky. They didn't have the barricades set up yet for the outdoor pool, but asked if we wanted to see it anyway. As soon as I was outside, my legs gave out. I buckled to the ground, unable to move. I had to be carried off. I never even attempted to go to the Observation Deck at the top of the World Trade Center. I was too terrified to go near the buildings, let alone inside or on the top of them. I did manage to make it to the top of the Statue of Liberty and the Eiffel Tower -- sick, nervous, and shaking the entire time. I'm not going to do it again, but I did do it.
Despite my debilitating fears, I have traveled, by plane, trying to experience as much of what the world has to offer from the man-made to the natural. Life has treated me well. I hiked the Inca Trail with it's shear drop offs with little to no problems, but stopped short at the last fifty yards of Angel's Landing in Zion National Park. No, I really didn't have to see that last bit. I had climbed high enough without killing myself. People rarely die from falls on the Inca Trail, but
it seems there is at least one death a year at Angel's Landing. I didn't need to be that one.
I'm now at the point in my life where I have traveled everywhere I ever dreamed of as a child, and done more than I could have ever expected. My A list is done. Now I'm working on the B and C lists. My husband wants to go as a family to Australia. This could be a great adventure. I've done twenty-two hour flights before, but Australia may even be longer if we count the layovers. But what does one do in Australia? There is Ayer's Rock and the Great Barrier Reef, and I'm sure I can find some tour associated with the movie, Priscilla Queen of the Desert. But what is really calling me to travel all that way, besides people with a cool accent offering me a cold Fosters and shrimp on the barbie?
Each time I think about it, I think about the Sydney Harbour Bridge. The bridge is 134 meters high, approximately 440 feet or the equivalent of a 36 story high rise. It is the largest steel-arch bridge in the world. The Bridge Climb of Sydney Tour Operators offer three tours. The Discovery and Bridge Climbs are approximately three and a half hours with fourteen people per tour. The Bridge Climb is an overall sightseeing climb with the Discovery Climb based more on the engineering aspects of the bridge itself. There is also an Express Climb at two hours and fifteen minutes with twelve people per tour. This is designed more for the hurry-up, take the pictures, check it off the list type of tourists … Americans.
Being an engineer by training, I'm looking at the Discovery Tour. But will I truly be able to do it after traveling all that distance? If it is a windy day, or even not … because the wind could change, will I have the courage to take on both of my fears? Knowing myself, I'll at least start the journey. I'll at least make it to the bridge, inquire with the guides, and decide on the day -- in the moment.
XXX
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